My daughter turned five today.
She is a fierce little thing, that one. She has been that way since she was in the womb. Always kicking. Always moving. Always making me feel like she was going to jump out of my stomach.
She entered the world that way, too. Twelve hours of active, natural labor before the doctors decided she was not coming into this world the way I wanted her to. She had her own way of doing things.
She has tested my patience, given me heart palpitations and made me rethink my parenting abilities on more than one occasion. Like I said, she is fierce.
She is fiercely passionate about life. She knows how to have fun. She shows up to the party ready to eat cake and dance on the tables.
I am reminded daily of how the Lord must feel about me. That unconditional love that only a parent can understand.
I decided for her birthday I would write her a little letter. She loves getting letters in the mail and I knew she would enjoy reading it with me. So, excuse me while I sit in a corner and cry a little about the fact that five years have passed since I first held her tiny body in my arms.
Dear Sweet Girl
Happy Birthday, beautiful. I can't believe you are FIVE YEARS OLD. Where has the time gone? Okay, we don't really have to discuss that now. I know how inquisitive you are and if we start talking about time, we will be here all day.
Seriously, though. You are five now. I have thought about this day many times. I have thought about how I would feel. How you would look. Would you still have red hair (even though your father insists your hair has always been blonde). What your personality would be like.
First of all, can I tell you how much you amaze me every single day. Really, you are such a cool girl. You are fun and loving and high spirited. I know some days that high-spirit seems to wear me out, but I promise, I wouldn't want you any other way.
I have a short list of requests on your 5th birthday. I know, it's YOUR birthday and I'm over here telling you what I want. I'm your Mamma, so you have to listen. Here we go.
1. You march to the beat of your own drum. Please don't ever let the world, included me, tell you that is a bad thing. The world needs more independent thinkers like you.
2. Your heart is BIG. Keep it full of love. The world needs more love.
3. You are always asking to help out. Make your focus on others. This world will try to tell you it is all about YOU. Please don't believe them. This world needs more people willing to help out. Help when you can.
4. You are always asking questions. Questions are good, but sometimes you need to try to figure things out on your own. Be a problem solver and use that smart brain of yours.
5. You have A LOT of energy. Whew, where does it come from? Use that energy for good. See # 3 above.
6. You really love music. I love music, too. I promise to let you listen to the music you want as long as you let me listen to the music I want sometimes. We both like artists like Adele and Taylor Swift and one of your favorite songs is Hallelujah, the Jeff Buckley version of course. That's really cool that you know who Jeff Buckley is.
7. You always ask me when you can be big like me. Please try and stay little for as long as you can. I promise, being a grown up is worth the wait. Be silly. Get messy. Run around and chase your friends. Sing at the top of your lungs. Play dress-up and pretend you are Elsa. When was the last time you saw an adult wearing a princess costume? Stay little, my sweet girl.
8. You know about Jesus. You know songs and stories about him and you know how he died on a cross. Keep believing, even if you have to ask a whole lot of questions. I promise, Daddy and I will answer all of them. He will fill that sweet heart of yours with so much love and joy if you let him.
Well, that's all I have for now. I'm sure I will think of more as you get older. I can't wait to journey through year five with you.
Love,
Your very emotional Mommy
